Stuff my 2 year old has said that made me crack up!
"Rockets on deck! Tell me what's next, alien sex!" (From the song ET by Katy Perry with Kanye.)
"Mommy, you're the biggest mommy in the whole world!"
"I feel empty inside."
"I'm going to run away, crying!"
"Don't touch my private area!" (She got that from me telling her not to touch the dog's private area.)
"What the f***, Mommy?!" (Thankfully, she has stopped saying that!! She's starting preschool tomorrow and I'd be mortified if she said it at school.)
"You're pissing me off." (I admit, this one is my fault, but it's the only cuss word that is!)
"How wonderful, how thoughtful!"
Me: "Come here and help me clean up." Kaylee: "Oookay. But I won't like it!"
"PS He is not getting the moon and PPS when I'm done with him he's going to be begging for mercy!" (She got that from Despicable Me, hahah!)
Me: "Do you want soup or mac & cheese?" Kaylee: "Sorry, I'm not home right now."
"Mommy, I can't seem to fly!" *starts to cry, flapping arms*
"The honey farted!"