Second Day Of School

Today was Kay's second day of school. She went to bed late last night so she was really tired and cranky this morning. She cried the entire time I got her ready and it broke my heart. She just wanted to roll over and go back to sleep. I tried to give her breakfast on the way but she wouldn't eat it. Luckily, they have snack time an hour after they get there, so she'll hopefully eat then. I sat with them in circle time for a few minutes until she seemed to cheer up a bit, then did a quick see you soon and slipped out. I had to order Steven to leave before that because she was clinging to him and sitting in his lap. She always knows Daddy will save her. She knew to appeal to him when we were going inside, she starting whining piteously that she wanted to go home with her daddy hahah. So sad but also so cute. Poor thing. I keep having to remind myself this is better in the long run for her to have the social experience and for me to get my degree.

So we went out for a quick breakfast, and of course I was freaking out. I saw a kid in a high chair, I felt like crying. I saw what she liked to eat on the menu and I felt like crying. I saw a toy machine on the way out and yeah, you guessed it, I felt like crying. So after that we headed to the mall to return some boots we just got for Kaylee that turned out to be too small. Being in a children's store made me feel very strongly like crying. Then passing the kid's play area on the way out made me actually tear up but with Steven's constant reassurance we left without me having a panic attack hahah. Ask me how glad I am that we have to leave in 2 minutes to pick her up. That's 45 minutes early and boy is it a relief. I miss her like crazy, I don't know how I will ever get used to this. Of course, the reason we have to pick her up early is also going to upset me. We're off the the pediatrician to get her a tetanus shot. Steven's not coming, it's just me and my mom and we're both not great in that situation. I can only imagine how much fun it's going to be. Oh well, hopefully she'll get over it and we can have a nice afternoon with my family. (If you knew my family, you'd laugh at that.)

Oh and yeah, Steven started his new schedule. He's on afternoon shift now. I hate it in some ways, love it in others. Love that we can drop Kaylee off at school together, that's for sure! And that he can talk me through the nearly 4 hours she's there so I don't have a breakdown. I seriously start thinking I'm traumatizing her and she's not ready etc. etc. But it's better to start her now slowly and get her used to it than have to put her in just bam and not be able to come get her when I started back to college in January. Sigh, I pray to God that we are both used to it by then, or I will do HORRIBLY during class and fail everything!

Comments

Jenifer Harrod said…
This must be hard, I am saying a prayer for you. I know God will lead you to the right answers in this situation. Just trust Him and lean on his word. He will never fail you!

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